Gold Nugget Coaching

There are times when we get so overwhelemed with a problem that we can’t seem to find our way out. I often see this when people are worried about a problem or situation that’s important to them, such as a challenge at work, their career, or in their personnel life.

Just when you most want to see things clearly, your thoughts just go around and around: What if this happens? What if that happens? What if I do X and they do Y? What if they do A and B and I do J, K and L?  On and on it goes.

Many times, you wind up even more frustrated and confused than when you started, and mentally exhausted. Here’s an easy and invaluable tool you can use to cut through all that mental chatter, CALM DOWN, and tap into your own wisdom.

The tool is called free-writting. Just follow this simple steps:

• With pen and paper in hand, find a quite and compfortable place where you can sit and write without being disturbed for at least 15  minutes.

• Compose a question that relates to the problem or situation, is briefly stated, future oriented, and positive. For example, if you’re having a problem with someone at work, your question might be: How can I transform my relationship with Mary so it’s cooperative and fun?

• Then just start writing without stopping for ten minutes. Write whatever comes up, even if it doesn’t have anything to do with the question. Write from the thoughts that float into your head; write from your heart.

  Don’t worry about spelling or punctuation or sentence structure or anything other than keeping your pen moving. Write without stopping no matter what, even if you momentarily run out of things to say. Even if you have to write, “I don’t know what to write,” or “The cat’s asleep,” then write that until you find yourself back on track. Just keep writing without stopping.

• After 10 minutes, stop writting. Now read through what you just wrote and highlight whatever stands out, whatever grabs you, whatever is meaningful to you—even if you don’t understand why. Highlight these promising chunks (the “gold nuggets”) and leave behind the gravel.

Then what you do next depends on what you came up with. Perhaps the gold nuggets will reveal some actions you can take immediately. Or there may be the kernel of ideas that you can reflect and build on that will lead you to positive steps you can take. Or there may be ideas that reveal that the problem isn’t what you thought it was.

Regardless of what you come up with, you’re likely to have some new insights that help you move past the breakdown.

And remember, this tool is one you can use whenever you want some fresh ideas.