Welcome to Part 3 of this six–part series on how to take better control of your life and career through the art of making powerful offers.

Last week I showed you how to orient your offers to different listeners so that they have the greatest chance of being listened to. Keep in mind that we’re working on “powerful offers” that can dramatically impact your career and/or bushiness if accepted. Therefore, before you go out and “play with live (offer) bullets,” it’s worthwhile to hone your offering skills by doing some practice. This week I’ll lay out some simple steps you can follow to build your “offer muscle.”

Offers come in all shapes and sizes

There are lots of ways to make offers. For example, through proposals, letters, e-mails, resumes, over the telephone, through a web site, and in face-to-face conversations. I urge you to keep in mind that in all of these instances, there is a speaker (you), a listener, and your listener lives in a world of opportunities and concerns. Even today, when on-line robots read resumes, those robots are merely surrogates for human beings who live in a world of opportunities and concerns for which they are responsible.

The focus in the practice exercise that follows is on making verbal offers because there’s a high likelihood that no matter what initial form you use to make your offers, at some point, verbal offers will be part of the process.

Avoid shooting yourself in the foot

So that none of your reactions come as a surprise to you when you’re making real offers, I urge you to practice making offers. By doing this you will experience what happens to you and your listener when you make offers. Some of it may surprise you. By tuning in to yours and your listener’s reactions, both verbal and non-verbal, your surprise factor will be reduced. You will be much less likely to be thrown of course.

Bottom line, practice is the way to avoid shooting yourself in the foot when, for example, you’re making that big career offer that can open up new and exciting career possibilities for you.

The purpose of the practice is not to script yourself. Instead, you want to start observing your subtle reactions in the offer process. These reaction can be in your body and/or in in your ability to speak.

Notice your reactions and allow them to become familiar and accepted by you. Notice things like: Do your words flow easily? What body sensations do you have? When your listener is speaking are you listening or are you thinking about what you’re going to say next? 

Practice making offers

Practicing can be approached as an opportunity to learn or as drudgery. I guarantee you will get more out of it if you approach it as an opportunity to learn. The steps are simple. Just follow them and relax.

1. Invent an offer to practice with. Make it a meaningful offer that you think is relevant at work or to an organization that you’re a member of. Pick an offer that you think will make a difference for you company or organization if accepted. But also keep in mind that you’re only picking something to practice with. You are not committing to actually make the offer at this time.

2. Invite a partner to help you do the exercise face-to-face with some basic role playing. You can simply tell the person that you want to practice making offers. It will take about 30 to 60 minutes.

3. Get together with your partner when you agreed to do so.

4. Describe the situation to your partner for the offer role playing exercise. Include location (an office, meeting, water cooler, etc.), time of day, and some background on the situation that has you making an offer.

5. Tell your partner what “hat” you want them to wear (economic, consumer, or craftsman) in the role playing. If you’re unfamiliar with the different types of hats, read  my previous post.

6. Tell your partner what kind of “observer” you want them to be (glass is half full, half-empty, fine the way it is, full when it’s really not) in the role playing. If you’re unfamiliar with the different types of observers, read my previous post.

7. Once you have a common understanding of the situations and roles, start the role playing. Ask questions to reveal their concerns. Sense whether they’re open to your offer.

8. When you see that it’s an appropriate time to make your offer, do it by saying these exact words: I offer to <your offer here>. When you make “real” offers you may or may not choose to use these words. But say them for the sake of being absolutely clear in the exercise. When you present your offer, speak to their interests, needs, and concerns. Demonstrate understanding of and appreciation for the perspective of their “role.”

9. After you complete your role-play, ask for feedback on what your offer was like for your partner and what specific things you might do to improve. For example, your partner might say, “Your offer was fine, but it felt like you got to it too quickly. Why don’t you spend a little more time telling me about your professional background?”

10. Keep repeating the situation until you and your partner are satisfied that your offer triggers a sincere acceptance from your partner.

Repeat steps 3 to 7 for the other “hats” and “observer” combinations. Again, the purpose of this exercise is not to become scripted. In fact, if you or your partner feel that you are becoming scripted, do something to stop that, such as changing the situation or the role-playing, or even the offer.

Next Time

In Part 4 of this series I’ll show you how build trust so that your offers are taken seriously.

I’ll post Part 4 next Friday.

© 2006 Gold Nugget Coaching